NFL introduces Play15 for lazy, overweight children

NEW YORK - Citing the success of their Play60 program, the NFL announced today it would be starting Play15, a new initiative aimed at morbidly obese children for whom 60 minutes of physical activity simply isn’t an option. "The NFL is America’s league, and Play15 reflects that," said NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell. "We’ve designed a program that appeals to average Americans, ones who spend 75% of their time eating food, watching football, and watching shows about food or f[...] continue reading ›

Eagles fans angered by Riley Cooper, every other player

PHILADELPHIA – In the fallout from wide receiver Riley Cooper’s racial remarks at a Kenny Chesney concert, Eagles fans say they are deeply angry with Cooper, as well as with every other player on the team. The fiery fan base, notorious for incidents like cheering for Michael Irvin’s career-ending neck injury and intentionally vomiting on an 11-year-old girl, has made it clear that Cooper’s actions will not be tolerated among their ranks, nor will the actions of any other p[...] continue reading ›